Amit and Polina do China

over and out

2005-10-29T09:54:00.000+02:00

City: Bangkok
Province: none
State: Thailand
MBK Raids: 3
Altitude: low as it gets

over and out - my my my will you look at the time... is it time for heading back already? we both have mixed feelings about this, with friends and family making it easier, but jobs (and no jobs) and changes making us wish it could last longer. the era of more breakfasts and less money is nearing its end. soon it will be no breakfast and less money.

Pola's reverse economics - on Kao sarn road we bump into Uri, a friend from the mercury days, and his wife. after catching up a beat, we discuss the overweight situation. we tell them that we might send some stuff via DHL. the couple brings up the question wether adding the delivery charges doesnt make the shopping "not worth it". when I reiterate the question to Polina later she gives me a basic tour of economics: the more we buy the cheaper it will be, because if we buy two pairs of sneakers we save 600 nis, and if we add a cell phone, well...

and so we shop - we headed out and hard shopping fever took hold of the wallets. you gotta love this city. but not because it is being used as the king's family photo album. because while you run around between a mall under the queen's picture to a bazaar with many photos of the king and kids you can shop for a day and let go of 300 nis. we shopped intensively for two days and couldnt spend more then 500 nis.

and so we got serious - Pola sat on the bed and started drafting a plan for hitting MBK one last time. "Come on Pilgrim", she whispered, "You know you want to". so we did a double attack on the place. the first time we hit floors 1,2 and 6 , watched the new Wallace and Gromit and bumped into Uri and wife again while eating dead fish on rice balls. the seconds time we hit mostly the floors named after Pola: 3 and 4.

what i saw - Polina buying two cell phones and none of them for her. so I bought her one myself. and she promised never to upgrade again (or until 24 month have passed, whichever comes first ). then we went to see the new doom movie. good thing she had the phone to play with cuz if she actually looked on screen, she wouldn't sleep again.

one last thing - i took the last picture with shaking hands. like some sort of monthy python scetch, the chicken is the most frightning thing in Thailand at the moment. i did not get near them chickens when taking the photos so you can come and meet us. see y'all soon, y'hear?

Tao, way off season

2005-10-21T06:26:00.000+02:00

City: Some Bay place
Province: koh Tao
State: Thailand
parrotfish spotted: 38
Altitude: 2 m

Bad Atitude - full moon party at koh pangan, how 24-ish can you get? while we were sleeping in the comefortable hut in Haad Son, the full moon party was getting closer and closer. "not to worry" we assured our Thai hostess, "we are far too old to go to such a party." the thing is that the party turned out to be on the only day in which the rain didnt constantly hammer down in a week. we were so bored with staring at the hut walls that we signed up for a cab. a few police checks later we got off the taxi at Haad Rin. party!

full moon brawl - even though it was pretty early, the beach was crawling with people: fire jugglers and teenagers, undercover cops and drug dealers, old israeli males and young american chicks. two beers and a bucket (literally, for the thailand depraved) of vodka red bull later, we found ourselves hopping and jumping to the mellow 160 bpm sounds of techno. this was to be our 30 minutes worm up session, which was followed by a three hours workout at the at the torture house of 220 bpm drum and bass / jungle club. boom trrrr boom went the music, pant pant pant went our lungs. this music is mainly intended for people on extacy or animals with 10 or more legs, yet we survived.

Tao, Way Off Season - after one day of serious R&R, we decided to give Tao a taste. Tao is mainly a diving spot but we figured where there are dive sites there are snorkle sites, and we were not wrong, only 6 month late. the rain still hammered and we were struck by an unbeliviable string of obscure coincidences all telling us to ditch the island: we got the most expensive room in our thai trip yet, which turned out to have no running water in the toilet and no hot water, and electricity breakdowns, and people building stuff outside. while this is not bad luck par se, we took it as a divine sign to leave the resort (not to mention the fact that the beach sucked). we did, however, manage to never get to the beach due to weather, fall off the bike twice, have a very hard boat ride, have a shark trip canceled due to shark vacation of some sort, internet kept dying on us cus of weather, getting wounded in a puddle and using our heads to kill a stray dragonfly... in short, in two hours well get the hell out of here and back to samoi where u cant snorkle, but hey, at least we can get drunk!

and by the way - when god started toying with ideas for a nocturnal blood sucking insect it played around with a few possible designs, which are the mosquitoes we have in the middle east, europe, the states. when it was done playing around, it created the Thai mosquitto: a small insect that prefers invisibility to invurnerability, a noiseless engine, a non discriminatory taste for any blood type, and bites that itch so hard you have to turn them into little craters before the itching is gone. I have yet to catch a thai mosquitto on fim, but i have many bites to prove its exsistance.

Monsoon mud

2005-10-16T10:06:00.000+02:00

City: Haad Son
Province: Koh Pangan
State: Thailand
Avg. coffee cups per person since we left home: 4!
Altitude: 12 m

the almost fast - breaking 3.5 to 4 commandments in a year and going on a ferry ride on Yom Kippur do not mix well. what if god does exist? wouldnt this be the perfect oppertunity to reveal its mighty self by sending a killer whale to bash the ferry in deep seas? ( obviously another thing that dint mix is the documentry i saw on the family whos ship was attacked by a killer whale and their survival struggle that lasted 38 days till they were found by japanese fishermen). anyway, I decided to semi fast. real fast, i figured, is for 6 or more commandments broken. I'd take the semi fast which allows me to eat fruit and drink water. polina refused to join the insanity.

Fast Over - the very minute we got off the ferry. if god and I were on an Oprah show titled "I do everything for them but my dominions refuse to acknowledge my existance" and god would share this story, some fat lady would ask for the mike and tell the god: "ok, like, god, I have one thing to tell you: Once a sinner, always a sinner. and Amit: It's all about respecting yourself!".

No Place Like home - on the ferry from Samoi to Pangan we have half plans regarding our next step after setting foot on solid ground again. we do not want to head to the very same place where we were last time. we flip through a little ads book we recieved before getting on the ferry and find somewhere that looks nice. thing is it only looks nice and is way expensive to be in a beach bungallow. the guys there send us to another resort they run which stinks as well but you know what? its really close to Haad Son, where we were and really enjoyed. we return there and find the same old crew (Oh and Ang) with some new hands (On and Pai).

so what else is new? - that Haad Son is now bigger than it was, the prices changed and there are many many many israelies there. some nice (like us!), some came from Holon. since we must push forward and conquer new ground, we decided to head to Koh Tao this time for a 3-4 day snorkeling expedition.

the name is Mud, Monsoon Mud - we also decide to take a jeep and check out the beaches on the east side, so we can find where to hide in future times. the roads in Pangan are awful so we choose the jeep over the scooter. on the day we do this we are hit by the worst monsoon rain yet. the jeep ride, through the islands center, is a rollercoaster ride with mud for tracks. we use the shit out of the 4 wheel drive. when we get all the scared us shitless way to the other side we realize we dont really want to go bungallow hunting in the pouring rain. we put'er in 4wd and make our way back.

short update

2005-10-14T09:56:00.000+02:00

City: Haad Son
Province: Koh Pangan
State: Thailand
watermelon shakes downed: 14
Altitude: 11 m

Do you remember the modem, a wonderful device with slow upload and download rate? we found the last active modem in the world! 2.4 baud!!

anyway, till we hit some bandwidth vein, were all good and in Pangan. more soon...

year of the cat

2005-10-09T15:55:00.000+02:00

City: Lamai
Province: Koh Samui
State: Thailand
Pineapples consumed: 8
Altitude: 1 m

flight plight - imagine us on a tiny plane, seated infront of two american dumbasses that cant stop giggling if theyre life depended on it. me and Polina switch to Russian and speak out loud about "Amerikanski" being "ne kulturnei ludi" ( uncivilized) but it doesnt help. we bang our heads in the seats in front of us until the ppl who sit there think were just as annoying.

samui airport - Samui's airport must be the funniest ive been in to date. its less an airport and more a big hut with a single conveyer belt. I try to pull out the camera but the bags come flying on me and so I fail. I also need to focus on pulling the Bar-Nir Square manuver.

the Bar-Nir Square Manuver - known as the Bar-Nir - Nepomnyashy manuver until last year, this manuver is meant to shake off excess Israeli presence. some of you might think that this is a pointless Zen excercise with regards to traveling in Thailand but it works, thank you very much, and its quite easy to pull:

1) collect bags from the world's worst human engineered Conveyer belt
2) say "Chawang Chawang Chawang" whenever you see an Israeli (read: constantly)
3) wave the Israelies as they board Chawang bound taxies.
4) pull out a 100 baht and a smile and fish a Lamai bound taxi.

the year of the cat - we settle down in Lamai, not far from the Weekender, our last valid Samui address from 2003. the island seems to be under an organized feline attack. its not clear if these are real cats as in some respect they act more like termites: the way they attack the wooden huts and sleep in massive colonies for example.

the sea - is really a short introduction to the Koh Pangan week ahead. warm, clear water. hey, there goes the pineapple guy! charge!!!

Decadence

2005-10-07T12:53:00.000+03:00

City: Bangkok
Province: none
State: Thailand
Coords: 13° 45' 0N, 100° 28' 60E
Altitude: 1 m

first thing's first - this is really sick. disgusting. this place and the way westerners use it. and why? just because the food is cheap? and the lodging? and the massages? and the shirts? and the sushi? and the transportaion? and the women? or are they men?

return to bangkok - we land at the world's most polluted city at like 2130. walking out of the plane is like walking into a full dryer: so hot and humid u feel like something huge throws u around in a tin container. we pant and get the bags. we now have a crushproof suitcase as well as backpacks. china is called china for a reason: it comes from China. if the last sentence doesnt make sense, trust me, it does. taxi to kawasan road.

kawasan - we jump out of the taxi and into the rain and go searching for a place to sleep. Old Faithful (D&D Inn) is packed. it takes us around 30 minutes until we find a coffin to sleep in. we go out and eat phad tai and pineapple. we smile, drink, crash in bed.

the first day - wake up early, eat museli, have a massage. we go to mbk to eat sushi from which we were so long deprived (speaking of decadence ) and have a massage. pineapples too. we buy tickets to Koh Samoi for the morrow. my japanese instincts that seemed to die in the last China days revive.

write once, read never - and by the way, just so you all know, the whole time we were in china it was impossible for us to reach our own blog. something about the chinese goverment and freedom of speech. so this is like the first time i post and see. this might also be a good oppertunity to thank the two unknown soldgiers who helped run the show. thanks ppl, u rock!

now he goes paranoid - is there a point continuing the blog now? what will it be like? "we went to the sea and ate another pineapple?". a short essay titled "My Summer Vacation" ?

a 1000 words: today's lunch

2005-10-05T13:07:00.000+03:00

Aftermath: random thoughts on China

2005-10-05T12:35:00.000+03:00

City: Beijing
Province: Beijing Shi
State: China

the food - people! please dont scare your friends! chinese food is not only edible, its also delicious. after the initial shock wore off (2 days I guess) we started enjoying the chinese cuisine. like any trip, the best food turned out in the wierdest of places and cost nothing.

the food 2 - the only difference between a chinese breakfast and a chinese lunch is when you eat it. we had a chinese breakfast today. this delayed lunch to 7 pm.

traffic rules - actually there is one traffic rule in China, which goes something like this: wherever you are, whoever you are, do what you feel like and make sure everyone yields to you. you can be a yak herder on the fucking highway, you can be a truck driver going reverse on the bicycle lane or a blind man with a 707 jet, people must yield to you. if they dont, go faster and use the horn. we have seriously witnessed drivers going through a red light picking up speed before a pedestrian crossing so they can dopler their pedestrian ass with the horn.

physical activity - these people own! especially the old people with no teeth who can't eat but can jump around and dance! Tai Chi is the tip of the iceberg, people. a true superpower of gaming, chinese people will play anything from online games to board game to, of course, sports of all kinds. nothing like watching a 112 year do something you cant get your 30 year old body to do.

speaking of which - the goverment setup gym-like equipment in the streets for the people to use. seeing them in the streets and not using them beats paying 5000 nis a year and never going...

jobs - China has the biggest amount of lousy jobs I have come across to date. these include: coal carriers, road sweepers, traffic controllers (to which no one listens), obviously the riksha drivers (motorized, manual, bicycle), scisor cleaners, pig shovers, fish drowners, pet trainers, etc...

what you simply must take to China if you go - earplugs.

what you think you must take but you dont really need - toothbrush: everyhotel has a new brush waiting for you.

the women - unless your on a strict blond diet ( or asians give you nightmares due to prisoner camp experience) , china is the place for you: there are around 300 million single women who are not too shy; around 90 million of them look really good.

the men - suck but what do I care?

Back to Beijing

2005-10-05T12:16:00.000+03:00

City: Beijing
Province: Beijing Shi
State: China
Coords: fallingrain.com is dead :(
Altitude: fallingrain.com is dead :(

Culture shock 2 - Back to Beijing, which looks different now. when we first got here it looked mean and troubling, with no english and nothing to eat. now, after a month in China's back yard, we come back to beijing and it looks like NYC: everything is huge, everything is written in a mishmash of chinese and english, everything is clean and comfortable. the new hostel rocks. go Beijing.

National day - On the 1st of October 1949, the honorable Mao Dzedung, the head of the chinese communist party declared at the Tianman square of the new Peoples Republic of China. as a result the whole week is a national holiday here, which makes siteseeing a drag. if its not enough that 12 million beijingers are on holiday, people from all over the country head here. we made the foolish mistake of heading to Tianman this morning, and the really gigantic square was hidden behind 28 million chinese. we went to the park instead to watch old people walce to trance music and to the unforgetable hit "who let the dogs out"

other than that - we kill time, each with his own favorite passtime, and wait for tomorrow, which holds the first thai pineapple (and possibly a massage?)

Happy holidays

2005-10-04T14:08:00.000+03:00

City: Beijing
Province: Beijing Shi
State: China
Coords: north , west or east
Altitude: elevated, man...

short message just to wish all our readers (all six of them, as Amnon Birman would say) happy jewish holidays and happy new year. if you not jewish, happy other holidays and you may continue with your current year.

also, while were at it, please congratulate amitbe for exactly three full month of not smoking ciggies, 5 weeks of not smoking anything, and 4 years and 364 days with his significant other, polachka...

tomorrow: chinese special.
cya.

Gamer's Launge - Cyber Cafe, Chengu

2005-10-02T06:59:00.000+03:00

City: Chengdu
Province: Sichuan
State: China
Coords: 30° 40' 0N, 104° 4' 0E
Altitude: 529 m

Trip over - and honeymoon begins, as this post shows. The Tibet plan fell through due to lack of time. we kill time by doing some shopping and just hanging out in the city.

the revelation - a series of ads with warriors and swords on the outside of a 70s looking mall are all in chinese with the exception of one word: online. we climb the first floor and find a moldy mall selling cell phones and fabrics. the escalator to the second floor is dead. i climb, reminding myself of the extreme physical activity I enjoyed only a week ago. hmmm.. a world of warcraft poster. bingo.

the place - the whole 3rd floor is a giant gamer launge, hundrads of computers are spread out in a comfortable non asian manner. space, red couches, earphones and mikes, strong hardware. on my first visit there we come early and the place is hardly even open. on the second, at night, the place is packed.

the wife - on both occasions the wife enjoys a few hours to her shopping self. go blow a million yuans I tell her and sit down.

the game - the best of online games, the old habbit, the nasty addiction, the two years down the drain to become the best of the mediore players, Counter strike. Counter strike is like the Blitz Chess game of online gaming to which nothing compares. it is emphetamines and crack combined. but more than everything it is Blitz chess: a crowded board with 32 players, a game over in one mistake and 2 minutes, the first pion dropping after 4-8 seconds. it takes the body 30 minutes to adjust to the new pace and start giving results. sometimes you dont even have to make a mistake. you run, as should, against walls. you cover open spaces as quickly as possible. your weapon is loaded. but your simply out of your legue. some mofo with a AWP 'one shoot one kill' sniper rifle giggles as you drop.

the down - like any other drug it takes you sometime to slow your reactions. the woman comes with bags and puts something on the table and says its cute. I cant really focus on what it is. when i ask her the time she says i asked her the same exact question 12 seconds ago. I make a mistake and no one shoots me.

next stop - beijing.

songpan

2005-09-29T13:51:00.000+03:00

City: Chengdu
Province: Sichuan
State: China
Coords: 30° 40' 0N, 104° 4' 0E
Altitude: 529 m

Songpan - small city with 70,000 ppl and one computer. hence the sudden post boost.

the Songpan Equilibrium - songpan lacks toilets, hot water, electricity, and good hotel rooms. from here we derive the following equilibrium:

1) if there is a toilet in the hotel room, there are no hot water
2) if there are hot water room, theres no electricity
3) if theres electricity in the room, theres no toilet.

the muslims - Songpan has a large muslim population that does not seem to orthodox: there are no burkas, a few beards, and no one hates the jews. I guess they are not wahabi, sunite or shiaite. can we do some exchange here?

the tibetean villages - as Songpan is on the verge of the tibetean plateu, there are many tibetean villages around songpan. just like a muslim village is easily identified by the mosque, tibetean villages are identified by the flags that shed good fortune on the village. they have prayer wheels, that the analphabet can use to pray by going around the temples (clockwise!) and turning the wheels that have the prayer text imprinted on them. since they divised such a brilliant mechanism for prayer they also stick these wheels in the river so the water can pray, let the wind pray, etc..

Park aftermath - A Zen Tale

2005-09-29T13:31:00.000+03:00

City: Chengdu
Province: Sichuan
State: China
Coords: 30° 40' 0N, 104° 4' 0E
Altitude: 529m

Two monks were walking Jiuzhaigou park and contemplating.

Said the first monk: Jiuzhaigou is best photographed with my new SLR film camera. that is because, my brother, that the Buddha nature of the park is water and stone, which are earthly and corporeal. and the film's Buddha natura is also earthly and corporeal.

Argued the other: oh no, brethen! Jiuzhaigou is best photographed with my new SLR Digital camera. you see, the park's Buddha nature is made up of 'Green', many shades of 'Blue' and 'Beauty', all of which are heavenly and noncorporeal. and the digital camera keeps the image in memory, which is also heavenly and noncorporeal.

As they speak, they met an enlightened monk and conveyed the question to him: what is the best way of capturing the Buddha nature of the park?

Said the enlightened monk: the best way to capture the Buddha nature of the park is with ones eye. the eye is corporeal, and captures the water and stone. the mind is noncorporeal, and captures the green and blue and beautiful.

Shouted the two monks at the enlightened one: why the hell did we spend 600$ each on the new SLR cameras?!?

Said the enlightened one: cuz that is your Buddha nature.

p.s. the writer doesnt know anything about Zen, Buddhism, or cameras.

A day at the park II - Jiuzhaigou national park

2005-09-29T13:19:00.000+03:00

City: Songpan
Province: Sichuan
State: China
Coords: 32° 36' 0N, 103° 35' 60E
Altitude: 2829 m

the name - I suggested a different name with a similar pronounciation to the chinese goverment - "Jews, I go!"

the shape - Jiuzhaigou is massive. a Y shaped park scaling 30 kilometers from entrance to either ends of the Y.

the schedule - two days visit, one for each end.

the assistance - still roaming around with Adi and Oren, who are still cheap. we try to scam the parks to get a false student discount and get busted. we avoid buyin bus tickets the first day and fail to use it on the second day with no ticket. the consequences: on the morning of the second day we walk 5 kilometers through stuff we allready saw the first day only to get busted by a park ranger. thats not as bad as seeing polina pissed off the way she was for walking the redundant kilometers.

the attraction - in one word: water. water doing anything that is waterly possible, which basicall means, they do anything but go upstream: get colored, change color, split color, amaze in color, become a lake, become a pool, become a swamp, become a stream, stream horizontally, stream vertically, fall and become a pool, pool and become a fall.

the real attraction - how all this is done without photoshop.

A day at the park I - Huang Long national park

2005-09-29T13:09:00.000+03:00

City: Songpan
Province: Sichuan
State: China
coords: 32° 36' 0N, 103° 35' 60E
Altitude: 2829 m

the party - we are joined by Adi and Oren, the couple we met on the horse trek. they are on a strict spending diet and their calculations show that it would be cheaper for them to travel with us. that is true twice: first because we split cabs, and second because compared to us compulsive spenders they do look cheap...

chinese parks - are so well preserved. they got wooden walkways throughout the park. at Huang Long, where the whole ride is 4 kilometers you might go "niya!" but at the gigantic Jiuzhaigou park (30 kilometers in two different directions) that is simply an amazing accomplishment. besides that they have the litter police, a special force that roams these wooden walkways with scisor like aparatuses and clean the walkways from any piece of dirt on iy. anything down to the subatomic level.

the attraction - Huang long national park displays a unique phenomena (tell me you havent heard this one before): it has calcium rich water flowing leaving their calcium deposits behind and creating cute pools with colorful water in them. this looks really stunning until you reach jiuzhaigou.

Learn chinese III - speaking to your horse

2005-09-29T13:05:00.000+03:00

City: Songpan
Province: Sichuan
State: Israel
Coords: 32° 36' 0N, 103° 35' 60E
Altitude: 2829 m

CHA! - go
YOOOW - stop
Hau Ma! - good horse

Ice Mountain horse trek - day 3

2005-09-25T12:46:00.000+03:00

City: Songpan
Province: Sichuan
State: China
Coords: 32° 36' 0N, 103° 35' 60E
Altitude: 2829 m

no horses - wake up again at 630, one by one the rest of the gang wakes up. granpa making breakfast again. but guess what, four of the horses never return from their nightly stroll. it takes forever for the guides to find them and granpa himself joins the search. finally at around 1100 we take off.

there is not much to tell about this day but the fact that we want a shower quickly! when we get back to songpan, bleak prophecies about the lack of water break down in a hot thorough stream. ok, so we dont have a toilet, so what? whats that compared to running hot water? whats that compared to the fact that you can scratch yourself without getting glued to yourself?

Ice Mountain horse trek - day 2

2005-09-25T12:32:00.000+03:00

City: Songpan
Province: Sichuan
State: China
Coords: 32° 36' 0N, 103° 35' 60E
Altitude: 2829 m

morning - wake up at 6:30. we have four guides: an alcoholic, a crazy english speaking guy, a quiet one, and granpa. granpa makes breakfast for us and the horses. english speaking guy asks us to leave everything in the camp because we are expecting a hard climb to the peak of ice mountain. we are heading for the base camp located at a height of 4300 meters.

the climb - everything is similar to Lord of the Rings "the two towers": the weather is bad, its cold and it keeps dripping rain, us on the horses with hoods against the rain, gloomy looks, aching asses, the desolate landscape, the neverending climb.

the vehicle - horses are an amazing animal. we were so ready for them to fall, stop, not be able to pass, get upset. they dont. instead they keep surprising us with their enduring power. go horses!
the lamb reappears - the alcoholic rides by and offers me a piece of the poor lamb from yesterday. at least it didnt die in vain.

the summit - after what seems like a rainy eternity we reach the summit. at 4300 theres an old man's shop. the 6 israelis storm the fireplace room and try to defreeze. attempts fail. we are so bewildered that we forget its a shop and buy nothing, but enjoy the free tea. eventually the old man loses his temper and throws us the hell out. we figure thats a sign to start climbing down...

the way down - is done on foot, thank god. since we took as little as possible we sat on wooden saddles all the way up. im pretty sure we wanted to get off the horse's back than they wanted us off theirs...

the camp - back to camp. two of the guys get altitude sickness and puke all over our tent. second night's sleep is less comfortable: the back and ass are soar as hell. just about any position sucks...

Ice Mountain horse trek - day 1

2005-09-25T12:12:00.000+03:00

City: Songpan
Province: Sichuan
State: China
Coords: 32° 36' 0N, 103° 35' 60E
Altitude: 2829 m

the night before - reached songpan after a 10 hour bus ride. this city is the poster boy for shithole. got of the bus. hooked up with 6 more people for the trek (4 Israelis, 2 irish). went looking for a room with a toilet and a shower. this proved to be an impossible task. the guy from the horse trek agency, who seems to run this town got us a horrible room out of the city for tons of money. in it we spent the worst night in china yet.

morning - get on that horse, head out of town. the horses are pack full of equipment so we dont actually sit on the saddle, which makes things easier. start to alk to fellow travellers. soon we realized that the younger couple, both alpinists, might continue with us to the national parks we intend to go from after the horse trek.

the lamb appears - we get off the horses to walk downhill for a while. someone notices that buried under some of the equipment that horses of another group carrie theres a live tied lamb. we are all horified by its condition. we speculate weather they are going to eat it but we wont taste it until the second day...

camp - we reach the camp site at around 4 and eat lunch. our guides set tents, fire, fix food. all we have to do is enjoy it. we check the view out and after dinner head to the first night in the great outdoors. ass is a bit sore but its sleepable...

out to trek

2005-09-23T03:30:00.000+03:00

City: Songpan
Province: Sichuan
State: China
Coords: 32° 36' 0N, 103° 35' 60E
Altitude: 2829 m

on horses. be back in three days. pola has a new haircut. details soon!

P-day (british colonialism style)

2005-09-21T07:46:00.000+03:00

City: Chengdu
Province: Sichuan
State: China
Coords: 30° 40' 0N, 104° 4' 0E
Altitude: 529 m

P-day has finally arrived! P is for Polina, P is for Pinnacle, and P is for Panda.

Early this morning we were awaken by one of the savage natives who seemed to be utterly excited. he kept on pointing at the minibus as if he wants us to follow him. once we settled into the van the native (who was now excited by the money we gave him) set into the concrete jungle. such sights we have seen on the way: markets under highways, brick makers and brick resellers, poor natives eating mud. none of this would prepare us for what we were about to witness...

once we cleared from the crowd he stopped the van next to a tacky statue of a bear. he pointed towards a small path and repeated the word "Daxiongmao", which in their primitive language, means big cat bear, with such excitement that professor polina started running into the bush.
And there they were, the legendary cat bears. these gentle giants do nothing but get extinct, snore and eat bamboo all day. when we got there the sun had barely shone its first light and already they were getting extinct, snoring and eating bamboo. and as day rose and the atmosphere became moist and sticky, they still got extinct, snored and ate bamboo.

By this time, the Japanese Snapashot fever that took hold of me while we were still under her majesty's sky in Tel-Aviv took control and I went full throttle japanese. I shot as many as 300 pictures and did some short movies as well.

there were also red pandas but i suspect the natives simply spray painted a raccoon to get the effect.

from mushrooms to peppers

2005-09-20T14:23:00.000+03:00

City: Chengdu
Province: Sichuan
State: China
Coords: 30° 40' 0N, 104° 4' 0E
Altitude: 529 m

mushrooms to peppers - just left Yunnan, the mushroom province. now in Sichuan, pepper province.

Piece of advice - except the obvious "dont take advice from me cuz i suck at that", here's another freebie, which i worked hard on generelizing so it would fit more places than the specific situation we ran across it: never, I repeat, never take a night flight from a mushroom province to a pepper province and then follow it up by taking a taxi into an unfamiliar city where the driver is a local version of forrest gump, who insists on talking the local language you dont understand to try and explain to you he has no idea where he is going and then drops you in the middle of nowhere because the road to the hotel you chose is being redone and so the whole bunch of workers and forrest gump keep on trying to help with their weird language but when u talk your weird language to them they give you the "we cant understand shit your saying" motions until you get the fuck out to another hotel with another cab. yeah. try not to.

Chengdu - bigger than all the cities weve been too so far, except Beijing, Chengdu is a twin city to Tel-Aviv moisture wise. After we woke up we walked the earth a bit. we went to the people's park (as there is somewhat of an attraction shortage), a place where old chinese people get together for free meals and mah jong games. and bonsai trees. on the way back we started looking for a place to eat. except the local junk on a stick, which we avoid religiously cuz we dont know the exact definition of junk, we saw no restaurants at all. and the few we did see had not a single english character (either a letter or an english speaking character) in site. we were allready heading to McDonnalds when we stumbled upon a restaurant with a semi english speaking waitress. yes! land ahoy!

peppers again - yes, everything came with red peppers. we got mushrooms but they had red peppers in them. we got cucumbers with red pepper sauce. everything comes with red peppers. except the chicken we ordered, which came with green peppers and two varieties of red peppers: regular and the dry and extra hot red peppers. after eating all this rice tastes different: it tastes like an antidone, something that has no taste but hey, at least its not hot. .

tiger leaping gorge - day 2

2005-09-18T07:29:00.000+03:00

City: Lijiang
Province: Yunnan
State: China
Coords: 26° 48' 0N, 100° 16' 0E
Altitude: 2394 m

breakfast - everybody wakes up at the same time. everybody eats breakfast together. one by one people leave with goodbyes. there goes Chi. there go the kids. we stay almost last, enjoy the amazing view for a few more seconds and head out as well.

waterfalls - the way down is sparcled with water and a few major waterfalls. there are no bridges over the falls and one simply passes beneath them. we spot the occasional mountain goat or mountain person and slowly make our way down. by now, pola's self declared fear of heights is nothing but a vague notion.

tina' s guest house - with busted legs, and flued bodies we reach the first sign of civilization - tina's inn. inside we meet familiar faces (a british group that passed us the first day). we eat something nasty and head out in a taxi to the bus station.

bus station? - the taxi drops us off where busses supposedly roam. we see no busses and those we do so dont stop. finally an english speaking chinese guy (english speaking! chinese guy!!) arranges a taxi for a good price and we go back to lijaing.

wheres the road? - if the road on the way there was windy, bumpy and freaky one can still say it was a road. the road on the way back might have been a road once but the constant water flow and constant rock avalanches made the goverment give up on it. its always a nice thought to have when you are on a road: "wow, there seem to be a very large number of rocks falling on this road daily.

lijiang - collapse. flu. momos. birthday. rain. rain. rain..

tiger leaping gorge - day 1

2005-09-17T08:54:00.000+03:00

City: Lijiang
Province: Yunnan
State: China
Coords: 26° 48' 0N, 100° 16' 0E
Altitude: 2394 m

navigtional info - first of all, due to miscalculating times we finisjhed the trek in 1.5 days instead of 2.5 days. that turned out pretty good as we both collapsed, each with his own illness.
basically this trek follows a part of the tibetian tea and horse road, a road used for commerse.
we started at an altitude of around 2000 meters and reached 2700 at the highest point. we followed the Yangzi river. the mountains on the other side were higher, around 4500 meters. maybe we'll do them next.

ticketing issues - early in the morning we found ourselves yoyoing between a ticketing woman chewing breakfast who claimed there are no tickets to the bus we need to and pointed left to a woman who will sell us tickets to the next bus. the other woman pointed at a computer screen showing places for the current bus then pointed right at the chewing clerk. finally we aarranged a summit between them and got on the bus.

pretty flower - is it possible we know someone on a bus from lijiang to qioutou?! as we get on the bus someone waves frantically. hey! its the girls that work in the hotel we stay in! i sit next to one of them. her name, she says, is pretty flower. they too are headed for a trip. i guess they dont take the bus often: on the first stop "pretty flower" pukes her pretty breakfast out the pretty window.

the smiling horseman - as we get ready to begin the trek we realize that the maps are outdated and we havent the slightest clue where to head. we notice a local horseman behind us who keeps pointing us the right way.

first crack - it's a well known fact that if a horse appears in the first act someone will ride it in the last. when we started making our way up polina exchanged her dignity for a 1 horse power vehicle. in other words the smiling horseman was officailly adopted, his horse (which was actually a mule) was named 'looloo' and polina enjoyed a scary ride up. better scary than strainful she always says. the smiling horseman kept smiling as i kept panting. he seemed very pleased with the fact i was about to faint and called a friend with a horse as backup.

24 to 28 bends - after a short break at the naxi family guest house we continued, extended family and horse, to the infamouse 24 bends, a steep climb up the mountain. while polina was enjoying her a/ced ride, some of us were in the process of working on our breathing technique in a very urgent manner. luckily, looloo had to stop every once in a while and me, your humble servant, had a chance to catch my breath and return in into my climbing corpse. when we finished the climb i was so beat i forgot to take a look at the view we climbed for. we immidiately started descending and walked an additional 1.5 hours to the tea and horse guest house.

breathtaking - the view? yes. but mostly the climb.

random comversation with a chinese tourist -
- "where you from?"
- "Israel"
- "where?"
- "Israel?"
- "no"
- "middle east?"
- "where?"
- "um, Palestine?"
- "oh! Palestine!"

the tea and horse guest house - yes! take them shoes off! drink some tea! eat eat eat!!! we eat with chi and three israeli kids. I notice massive bushes of weed growing wild. growing wild my ass. how come they only grow wild in the vicinity of guest houses?

another old one

2005-09-14T09:44:00.000+03:00

City: Li Jiang
Province: Yunnan
State: China
Coords: 26° 48' 0N, 100° 16' 0E
Altitude: 2394 m

Dali to Lijiang - three hours north by a bus that keeps climbing and climbing over rice fields and rice fields. we got late to the bus and got the worst seats in the bus. mine was even worse than pola's so i passed the first hour by mentioning it to her so i can hear the expected "let's switch seats!" plea. spent the middle hour dozing off, waking up to see the bus is still climbing them rice fields. last hour was spent with prayers for the rain to stop before we reach our destination.

Lijiang - prayers went unanswered. got out of the bus and into the rain. went guesthouse hunting, got pissed off in the effort, but ended up in the cutest naxi guesthouse.

Lijiang itself is as charming as dali, maybe a bit more. against the mountains shtik again, water in the streets shtik again but the city is not a grid like dali but a much messier pattern.

also checkout pics from the very nice black dragon pool park here in lijiang:

Naxi people - the naxi minority pass their time eating worms and yemenite food. they have zivas and melauach. their society is supposedly a matriachial one.

the morrow - out for a few days to do the tiger leaping gorge trek. see you on the other side :P

learn chinese 2

2005-09-14T09:42:00.000+03:00

City: Li Jiang
Province: Yunnan
State: China
Coords: 26° 48' 0N, 100° 16' 0E
Altitude: 2394 m

dzie dzien - bye bye
shwei - tea
your welcome - bu ka che

Create your own chinese minority

2005-09-14T09:29:00.000+03:00

City: Li Jiang
Province: Yunnan
State: China
Coords: 26° 48' 0N, 100° 16' 0E
Altitude: 2394 m

On the last day we spent in the ancient city of Dali, we got dragged, once again, into a tourist trap scheme. we wanted to go to the lake but instead we found ourselves in a minibus for two heading to a village with some obscure minority tribe with really weird habbits.

could it be that some enterpernuers understood theres money in minority tourism? In order to test my theory that it is possible to invent a minority for tourism purposes heres a short quiz with a few real and a few fake minority customs. can you figure out the real ones?

1) the ***** minority uses a written sign language that looks like the drawings of miro.
2) in the weddings of the **** minority it is custom to pinch the bride.
3) in the funerals of the **** minority it is custom to put tea seads on before covering the grave
4) the **** minority kick drums, benches and theirselves when dancing.
5) in the **** minority language, feminine objects are considered more than masculine objects.
6) the **** minority eats melauach and ziva-like baked goods.

my ex communist wife

2005-09-11T12:11:00.000+03:00

City: dali
Province: Yunnan
State: China
Coords: 25° 41' 60N, 100° 10' 60E
Altitude: 1970 m

kunming - dali - we travel from kunming to dali. a modern bus on a modern highway (under modern constrcution of an ultramodern highway). the trip is not as hard as we expected. in general it is safe to say by now that the whole china experience is not as hard as expected. we came packed for a jungle. everything we packed, from toilet paper to backpacks, can be bought here for a cheaper price. go figure: its not like its all manufactured here...

rice - "if ill see one more grain of rice i'll kill someone". no no no. dont get me wrong. i can eat rice, i just cant see it anymore: 5 hours from the very end of kunming to very beginning of dali you see nothing but rice fields. ok maybe an occasional corn or sunflower fields but you get the idea: mud houses, rice fields, working chinese.

dali - another town with not much to do but rest. dali is a quiet, dungeons and dragonesque city that is located bellow jade mountain, a 4km high green bulk. the main streets have water flowing from the mountains in little cannels. we walk the streets, eat the food, look at the many crafts sold by the locals. time goes by slowly when you are in rivendale...

my ex communist wife - you might not see it at first sight but the wife, who happens to be an ex communist, is highly adaptable. she steps barefoot where i have to put shoes on, showers and sleeps anywhere. she claims to have grown up like the little girls on the Dali streets. nothing scares her except the occasional spider.

bikes away - we rented bikes today and went on a short tour to the three pagodas outside dali. that went extremely well. when we tried to follow that success with an evening trip we found ourselves focusing on going down hill, returning the bikes and going to internet cafes...

stone forest

2005-09-11T11:53:00.000+03:00

City: Kunming
Province: Yunnan
State: China
Coords: 25° 41' 60N, 100° 10' 60E
Altitude: 1970 m

stone forest trip - on our last day in Kunming we took a daytrip to the stone forest. the signs on the park entrance strictly forbid any nature nudity so we decided to wait with that scene for a while. that did not seem to stop our bus buddy, a 50 years old blond american guy on whom it seems most blond jokes were written.

the park was impressive: the erect stones, supposedly the main attraction, we're soon forgotten and we found ourselves chasing the many types of butterflies that live in the park. some were as big birds.

it seems that the massive ammount of butterflies in the forrest caused the great spider migration somewhere around the sixies. from the moment we first spotted the biggest medium spider in china polina focused on exploring these majestic creatures. her theory of how the spiders get bigger as deeper as u get into the park was never debuffed.

me so horny - oh yeah, if you ever thought no one can get as annoying as israeli drivers with the horn - wrong! the chinese use it in the following manner:
1) if u wanna pass someone on the road, put your hand on the horn and dont take it off until you finish the pass.
2) if you see someone up the road in a car, on a bike, walking by, bleeding to death, put your hand on the horn and dont take it off until you pass him
3) if you are bored, apply the same technique.

markets and muslims

2005-09-08T15:24:00.000+03:00

City: Kunming
Province: Yunnan
State: China
Coords: 25° 2' 20N, 102° 43' 6E
Altitude: 1910 m

look ma, no pics! - due to the uncomprehensively retardedness of the kunming computer infrastructure, no images could be d/led at this time. text only post...

out of Beijing - travel 2000 km southeast, lose 10 celcius degrees, elavate 1850 meters, swap sun for rain.
welcome to Kunming.

Kunming , first impression - we check into a hotel and go for a stroll on the street of the hotel. all the stores for miles in each direction sell nothing but sporting equipment. I think we reached the city that manufactures the whole world's supply.

Kunming, second try - kunming, capital of the Yunnan province is very quiet and easygoing. the citizens of Kunming are hard core gamers. Bedmington and tai chi in the mornings, card games and mah jong in the afternoons, everyone here seems to be keen on some sort of time killing activity.

food - soo much better than the Beijing one. if, as the vegeterian slogan goes "meat is murder", then beijing is the capital of mass murdering, jeffery dahmer style, chefs: food is chopped in a frenzy, leaving little dice of meat and bone. as opposed to their overseas enemies, the japanese, who seem to care only about the way the food looks, the Beijing chefs care about getting the most out of anything. but kunming is different. there are western restaurants and even the local food is more aesthetic.

the market - There isnt really much to do here, thats why everything is so laid back. today we went to the bird and flower market. not many birds there. we passed through the muslim quarter and saw a mosque. wow. tomorrow we do some nature nudity scene then were out to dali, 1k ascend. bring it on.

McCommunism / learn chinese

2005-09-06T09:11:00.000+03:00

City: Beijing
Province: Beijing Shi
State: China
Coords: somewhere North, somewhat East
Altitude: 67 m

sorry. no means of rotating :)

Chinese words of the day
sie sie - thank you!
dajie - street

the wall ( no money! )

2005-09-06T08:34:00.000+03:00

City: Beijing
Province: Beijing shi
State: China
Coords: 39° 55' 44N, 116° 23' 18E
Altitude: 63 m

we took the great chinese tourist trap tour to see the great chinese wall. we refused to take the hotel tours. psha! those tours will only try to take you to noninteresting locations in order to sell you stuff. oh no. not us. well go the chinese way! we took the number 2 bus (the luxurious ones!) and set off with a bunch of in-bus spitting chinese.

turns out they are tourist trap targets as well: we started with the pre-ming-tombs-museum museum. there we followed the instructor and listened to educated mandarin explaination about the pointless doll displays of scenes from ming emperor lives.

then we stopped at the ming tombs museum itself. some grave arrangement they have, them emperors! underground halls, jade jewlery, nice mountain view park. it is indeed a truism: emperors rule!

then we went to the great wall itself at badaling, a small town north of Beijing. the wall is expectably amazing. see for your selves. we paid admission at 12 places. to make an expensive story cheap, by the time we got back to beijing we had no money for the cheapest riksha. lost again we made our way to the hotel. dont ask me how we got there. I was unconcious the whole time.

where most streets have no name

2005-09-06T08:18:00.000+03:00

City: Beijing
Province: Beijing shi
State: China
Coords: 39° 55' 44N, 116° 23' 18E
Altitude: 63 m

subway fun - on our way to the almost magnificant but very predictable lama temple we made our first attempt at the local public transportation. appraoching the ticket office, a river of screaming chinese swept your humble servent away from the destination window. the chinese seem to have no regard to others, chinese or not on their way to their own goal. Pola claims communism (or mccommunism in the chinese case) does that to you. anyway it was obvious something more powerful must be used in order to purchase tickets so pola was aquipped with 6 yuan and shoved into the line. 12 seconds later we had tickets.

my Beijing
- "forget about the subway" I whispered to my wife. "let me take you through a tour of the other Beijing. the Beijing I know and love. the Hutong Beijing".
- "The Hu what?" asked pola.
- "hu tong" I said firmly. "the alleyways Beijing, the mom and pop stores Beijing".
- "since when do you know anything about Beijing?" she asked suspiciously
- "ummm... I read about it in lonely planet?"

Lost - its funny how its easy to get lost when you have no clue to what the street signs mean. after we finished to hutong tour, we were supposedly very close to the hotel and tried to make our way back. it seems the chinese will give you any answer to get you off their backs. so what if its wrong? after a few failed attempts we realized it was up to us to figure out how to get back. dont ask me how we did. i was unconcious when we finally made it.

Dicken noodles

2005-09-03T17:12:00.000+03:00

City: Beijing
Province: Beijing shi
State: China
Coords: 32° 4' 0N, 34° 46' 0E
Altitude: 34 m

China airport, first impression - the bathroom has a small plaque reading "Sorry, we can't accept your tips!". one of the benefits of traveling to a communist country.

graffiti - Beijing is probably the only metropolin we have visited that has no grafitti at all. none.
well maybe a few, but we dint see none.

Dicken Noodles - the hotel is located just next to the Beijing night market, a place that sells anything that has enough legs to walk the earth (and those who dont, which are easier to catch). the scent is terrible. the sites as well. we go around looking for normal grub. we end up in lee's noodle dump. we order chicken and dicken noodles. we figure that its just a typo but whatever comes back is no chicken. if u have a babylon installed and u know what dicken is please let us know.

forbidden city - wake up at 11 and drag ourselves out to see the city. not very forbidden by the number of tourists who hang out there.

scams and enterpernours - it is quite popular here to try to milk the tourist off of his money. we have been approached by students, artists, cab drivers, riksha pushers, dog trainers, prostitutes, all trying to get the green. when someone here says "I want to help" he really means "open your wallet".

internet chase - no visible internet cafes exists in beijing. LP claims the goverment simply doesnt approve of them. we went around forever looking for one, ran into students and artists trying to milk us off of our money, when trying to get to a cafe. finaly the answer is right under our nose: for an obscene amount of $$$ u can access the internet from the hotel. so appreciate the effort!

gonzo trip making featuring Pola.

2005-09-01T07:19:00.000+03:00

City: Tel Aviv
Province: none
State: Israel
Coords: 32° 4' 0N, 34° 46' 0E
Altitude: 34 m

gonzo is a funny word...

Beijing - first of all, where are the pandas? and the potatoes? and can you believe these chinese people? they built an entire forbidden city with not one forbidden mall in it!

Yunnan - Kunming has a bird market. i wonder if they have a squirrel market. panda market? potatoes market?

Sichuan - pandas! wait... they're not very good with hygiene, are they? ok 1 down, 1 left to go. potatoes?

Tibet - give me all your potatoes, you hairy krishnas, or ill rip your hearts out and puree them! what? budhists? whats the difference, they all dress the same.

Sichuan - pandas! potatoes? cell phone?

Beijing - potatoes! (at Mcdonalds)

Thailand - cell phones!

gonzo trip making featuring AmitBe.

2005-08-31T16:24:00.000+03:00

City:Tokyo-3
Province: Honshu
State: Japan
Coords: 35° 41' 6N, 139° 45' 5E
Altitude: 17 m

Although it sounds silly, gonzo journalism is a serious thing. Although it sounds silly, the ashes of Hunter S. Thompson, founder of the gonzo genre, were recently shot out of a cannon into the desert sky. anyway, this is me, remember, and this is how I gonzo plan our trip...

Beijing - holy shit: not a word of english. no one speaks english. no english signs. this is insane. why did we come here? siteseeing? no way am i heading for any fucking siteseeing! that sounds dangerous. what if i slip? i'll be screaming "My Leg! My Leg!!" while some non english speaking voodoo doctor saws my arms off. well, maybe the wall. maybe...
Yunnan - yes, tiger leaping gorge. that sounds like a world of warcraft region. anyway the nice ppl at salon said the gorge is gone. they are either a bunch of fartknockers from the lower east side or they're right and this is a waste of time. i'll plead the second on that...
Sichuan - what was i thinking? three days on horses? pola was right. my balls are damn right unidentifiable. and all for what for some parks? with some water pools?

Tibet - woman, are you insane? that's 5 km above water level. do you know what happens to fish when you pull them from 5 km under waterlevel? I am sooo dead. oooh can we go see them feed their dead to the birds?

Sichuan - are we back to 3 km above water level? can i open my eyes?

Beijing - I know this taxi driver is gonna kill us.

Thailand - did you know Al qaeda uses Thailand as a recreational getaway from those crazy islamistic boot camps? excuse me, can I have a life threatening tropical disease with that? that's a man? shut up! tropical fish are also dangerous.

home -cats are most likely dead. next year will suck. fail fail fluck fluck.

packing 101

2005-08-26T15:09:00.000+03:00

City: Tel Aviv
Province: none
State: Israel
Coords: 32° 4' 0N, 34° 46' 0E
Altitude: 34 m

packing theory

2005-08-25T10:48:00.000+03:00

City: Tel Aviv
Province: none
State: Israel
Coords: 32° 4' 0N, 34° 46' 0E
Altitude: 37 m

seriously, have we made all this progress in vain? are we always going forward in time just cuz it feels more natural? are we not to conserve energy by thinking less? shall we not enjoy the fruit of the labour of luckier people with more time on their hands?

Take me for example. say I go on a two month trip. 10 years ago I would have to do everything by myself. like decide what to pack, where to go, what to buy, where to stay. not today. not only you can find what to take list generators and info on how to pack it, not to mention gazillion sites that tell you where to go, when to do it, what to do and what not to do, why not do it, and so on.

while this worked perfectly for the buying and packing phase, the amounts of data were fucking overwhelming on the planning stage.

letsa go (no gum)

2005-08-23T23:45:00.000+03:00

City: Tel Aviv
Province: none
State: Israel
Coords: 32° 4' 0N, 34° 46' 0E
Altitude: 34 m

to open. to begin. to start. to start on. to start in on. to make a start. to set out on. to set off on.
to set up. to turn on. to set in motion. to commence. to launch. to embark on. to kick off. to instigate. to inaugurate. to get going. to get moving. to get cracking. to get down to it. to get a move on. to get your skates on. to get the ball rolling. to jump in. to leap in. to take the plunge. to step on it or step on the gas. to go for it. to make the first move. to get underway.

to establish. to found. to bring into being. to produce. to develop. to yield. to give birth to. to bring about. to institute. to instate. to generate. to originate. to initiate. to activate. to pioneer. to father. to attempt. to create. to atempt to create. to lights camera action.